Father Drinkin’
Part One….
Being Irish, there seems to be a stigma of alcoholism in the
blood, and once at a funeral, I heard the priest refer to it as “The Irish
Disease…” I think I was deeply offended, but then, my drinking problem wasn’t a
problem for me, just for everybody else.
I never really took to firewater, the hard liquor though I
tried all of them, but I do remember my first year in college and we had a
tequila shot drinking contest - my
roommate was an alcoholic by age 18, I was just starting my career, and I was
seeing TRIPLE. I sat down at the piano and played the same song over and over
again. It was either 96 Tears or Heart and Soul since those are the only two
songs I know.
From there, I got ‘polluted to the eyeballs,’ “three sheets
to the winds,” f*&^%ked up, probably every weekend, like good American
teenagers in college. We specialized in hangover cures of aspirin and Slurpees
and burritos and understanding what DEATH feels like.
However, being Irish, and knowing where this behavior ends,
usually with a funeral at somebody’s premature death, I knew I would have to
overcome this with ‘self mastery,’ and yet, self mastery eluded me.
Here’s how I started trying to stop drinking. An alcoholic
counselor told me it takes a full 90 days to detoxify the blood. Alcoholism is
actually a blood disease. The blood is like a tape recorder, and once fed this
high sugar intoxicant, it craves it more and more until you have a full blown
alcoholic who just can’t stop drinking.
As my mother always said, “One drop and you are an alcoholic!”
To which of course, her children had to go and test that
theory. My mother, Rose Francis Veronica Gallagher Boyle, never drank a drop of
alcohol in her life. Maybe she took a sip somewhere, but I never saw it. She
was the classic teetotaler.
Her father drank and when he drank, my grandmother,
Catherine Feeley Gallagher, had the priest come to the house and make him take
the Pledge. Apparently this was akin to an exorcism, but catholic priests in Jersey City in the early
1900s made home visits to make alcoholic dads take the Pledge. I suppose it
involved saying the Rosary two hundred times in a row.
So, James Gallagher generally abstained from drinking or
face the wrath of Catherine, his wife, and all was well, until one day he decided
to visit the Auld Sod, from whence he came, and took an airplane to County Lietrem, Ireland to visit his kin.
When he returned, it was apparent he had been on a bender,
since they served drinks on the plane, and of course, in the pubs of Ireland, where
they drink Jameson’s Irish Whiskey like water. I think my grandmother called
the priest again for another round of Rosary and psychological warfare until he
was again, sober.
But the specter of alcohol did not end there. The spirits
haunted my mother when she married my dad, Matty Boyle, who likewise came from
a hard drinking Irish Catholic family and when they married, ‘Nana’ or
Catherine Gallagher took all the booze they bought for the wedding reception
and poured it down the toilet.
Eyes rolled as the Boyle family welcomed the new bride, the
new teetotalling, snobby, prudish, Rose Frankie Gallagher into the family, a
family she would keep at arms length since she disdained their drinking.
But, the spirits haunted Matty Boyle and after his Navy
accident and head trauma, he liked his beer. Being a diabetic and suffering
headaches, beer was his medicine, and his downfall, and he died of heart attack
at age 62.
So, I knew I didn’t want to be an alcoholic when I grew up.
And, when I found myself unable to ‘stop’ I was pretty worried, and tried to
detox and abstain for 90 days.
Day One….
Day Two…
Day One….
Day Two…
Day Three!
Day One…
And this how it went. Until I got myself on Prozac and that
was the turning point. I weaned myself off of alcohol, and no longer crave the
spirits. I still drink, but only wine, and an occasional beer. No firewater. I
drink a lot of water. I meditate and do yoga. I steer clear of drinkers and
drunken culture. My life became incredibly boring as reality is fairly boring
unless you light up like a Christmas tree all the time.
And, yet, I found a new satisfaction: Inner Peace. Good
Health. Intellectual Pursuits. Success…Money….Love, all those things that
drunks avoid. They avoid them because they are hard to get. Drinking is
easy…dying is easy, living is hard.
Another 12 steps to stop drinking (alcohol)
- Make a
determination to stop or slow down your drinking
- Get a
date book or calendar and mark day one for the day you want to start and
stop drinking…
- try
cold turkey and see how long you go, marking the days.
- Start
again with Day One.
- Get a
prescription for antidepressants.
- You
may also need tranquilizers
- take a
yoga class or study meditation
- If you
don’t know how to meditate, close your eyes, take deep breaths and count
backwards from 100.
- drink
only beer and wine if pressured by friends and family
- do not
mix wine and beer, one or the other.
- day
one, start again, practice makes perfect
- day
two, day three, day one, start again
It takes 90 days to detoxify from alcohol. It is a blood
disease.
Of course we are all related to each other if we go back far enough, as well as various historical figures, but Y chromosomes are passed only from father to son, like surnames, so you can test any male Doherty relative to see if they have the Niall chromosome. There are sites online where you can buy the test.
The original study was published in the American Journal of Human Genetics.